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raisetheearth2015-09-21 09:40 pm
solvethepuzzle) wrote in raisetheearth2015-09-21 09:40 pm
Entry tags:
Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory [OPEN]
Who: Nathan, and OPEN
Where: Shepherd's Haven
What: Nathan relives a really bad memory
When: September 22
Warnings: Possible mentions of suicide.
Even amidst all that is happening, at least a semblance of a normal life goes on. It has to. Nathan's day revolves more around tending the plants than the animals. It's soothing work, in its own way, if messier than what he'd been used to before the invasion. There is a predictable pattern to it all that he finds comforting.
He is already kneeling when the feeling hits him, fortunately. Like everything around him has suddenly changed. Instinctively, he curls inward, wishing to make himself smaller. This isn't right. Isn't right at all. What is he doing in this room that he knows is from another life?
Anyone who passes by will notice him hunched there, almost eerily still, except for his quiet speech, uncaring in tone . . . that seems to be directed at no one. Any attempt to shake him out of it will result in no reaction. And then a pause, for a couple of moments, a stricken look passing over his face. More quiet talking, but more subdued in nature this time.
And then suddenly he's back. Back in Shepherd's Haven, not in that room. That room where . . . where . . . No no no no no no . . .
He lets out a gasp, but it doesn't stop there. His eyes are wide, terrified. He's shaking, breathing hard, trying desperately to get himself under control. All in an open field where anyone could see him.
[[OOC: If anyone might be in position close enough to hear Nathan's end of this, the recurrence starts halfway through page 7 to the end of page 12. (Content warning for suicide.)]]
Where: Shepherd's Haven
What: Nathan relives a really bad memory
When: September 22
Warnings: Possible mentions of suicide.
Even amidst all that is happening, at least a semblance of a normal life goes on. It has to. Nathan's day revolves more around tending the plants than the animals. It's soothing work, in its own way, if messier than what he'd been used to before the invasion. There is a predictable pattern to it all that he finds comforting.
He is already kneeling when the feeling hits him, fortunately. Like everything around him has suddenly changed. Instinctively, he curls inward, wishing to make himself smaller. This isn't right. Isn't right at all. What is he doing in this room that he knows is from another life?
Anyone who passes by will notice him hunched there, almost eerily still, except for his quiet speech, uncaring in tone . . . that seems to be directed at no one. Any attempt to shake him out of it will result in no reaction. And then a pause, for a couple of moments, a stricken look passing over his face. More quiet talking, but more subdued in nature this time.
And then suddenly he's back. Back in Shepherd's Haven, not in that room. That room where . . . where . . . No no no no no no . . .
He lets out a gasp, but it doesn't stop there. His eyes are wide, terrified. He's shaking, breathing hard, trying desperately to get himself under control. All in an open field where anyone could see him.
[[OOC: If anyone might be in position close enough to hear Nathan's end of this, the recurrence starts halfway through page 7 to the end of page 12. (Content warning for suicide.)]]
no subject
Shepherd's Haven being as small as it is, the walk only takes a few minutes. Nathan goes first, being that it's his house and the fact that he may be one of the few residents that bothers to lock his door. Just for his own overactive sense of security rather than an actual mistrust of anyone in the village. He is small and weak; he needs to feel safe.
The house is hardly anything special. Simple, neatly kept. Perhaps even excessively neat. Everything gives the impression of being incredibly organized . . . right down to the toys lined on the shelves, the majority of them being robot action figures. Even the partially-built Lego castle on the living room table is incredibly precise, no stray pieces lying about.
no subject
"Sorry," He gives a nonchalant shrug. "Thinking up new jokes wasn't high on my priorities list." He was kind of busy being sullen and grouchy. "Besides, it's too hot for fog it wouldn't make any sense." And sheep does? Tony please.
As expected, Nathan keeps an almost unnaturally tidy house. Not quite as bad as Lazarus, but still pretty bad. Really, who builds a castle like that? Even though it is pretty cool and Tony's a little jealous. Man, he misses his game.
no subject
Jacob's expression moves to both a sense of amazement and yet almost eerie, as they enter the home. Definitely nothing like his, cluttered with plants. The over-organization sets him at a level of which he's not sure what to think. Maybe odd for someone who looks so young, and it doesn't help that Nathan occupies toys. And yet, Jacob can't help if he gawks around a bit. He takes careful measures to follow Tony's, and especially Nathan's, lead. If a house is this tidy, he doesn't want to create any unpleasant experiences for someone he's just barely met.
As he looks around the living space, he does wonder just how old Nathan is. He does look young, but he doesn't really peg Nathan for a kid-kid. Plus, he's never met a child that would keep anything this tidy, and it looks like Nathan lives alone.
Not sure of what to say, he'll observe for the time being.
no subject
It doesn't occur to Nathan that anyone might find anything about how he lives to be eerie. But his precise cleanliness and the prominence of the toys really don't quite mesh as far as being normal is concerned. He has never been normal, and since becoming Numbered he is even less so. That is, after all, why there are so many toys around in the first place.
Something that also does not occur to him is to offer his guests anything. He hardly even knows how this works. Instead, he seats himself on the couch in front of the living room table, and slides a box of Lego out from underneath it.
"The two of you have met before." Maybe it's a bit of a clumsy way to get himself into the conversation, but Nathan hardly ever knows what he's doing in regard to talking to people. Besides, it is something that he had picked up on while he'd been calming himself.
He considers the Lego castle for a few seconds. Ah, right. He'd been working on the blue section. And so he picks out a blue brick and starts building again. No handfuls of bricks. Just picking them out one at a time, placing each one before getting another. Precisely everything about this is much too methodical.
no subject
He just doesn't know how. But enough of those thoughts, he shoves them aside and flashes a smile that's a little lackluster and doesn't quite meet his eyes. There's a lot on his shoulders coming back here, and Jacob's a welcome distraction from all of that.
A few beats once they're inside, it looks like Nathan isn't going to try to direct them anywhere, so Tony just goes to help himself to the fridge. Got anything to snack on, Nate? He's hungry. "Yeah, last month when I was..." He pauses, the awkwardness could be cut with a knife here. "On my way out of town." He finishes, then goes back to rummaging.
Yeah that's a subject he doesn't really feel like touching on right now, oops.
no subject
He sees Tony's smile, and it makes him pause for a moment. Was something wrong? Jacob thought about asking, but something told him he shouldn't. Not for now, anyway. Maybe he'd text him on the Network later and see if he was okay.
Jacob muses at Nathan and his castle. It's incredible. He politely finds himself a seat and observes. This is like something out of A Beautiful Mind. How long has Nathan been working on it?
Jacob nods with Tony's answer. "Yea, he was helping me out when I was walking home one evening. It turned into coffee and conversation. Tony's a pretty good guy."
no subject
His hand stops halfway to putting a new block in place when Tony mentions when he and Jacob had met. Oh. Well, that is . . . They'll just not discuss that. The goal here is to reduce anxiety and that topic will probably do no such thing.
"Yes, he is." But that much he will say, because he still believes it even if Tony might not.
And he resumes building, each brick clicking softly into place. The repetitive sound and motion soothes him, calms his nerves. This particular project had been started last night. It is much further along than perhaps it should be, considering that. Nathan is a tad obsessive.
no subject
Tony will just content himself with scrounging around in the fridge, settling on an apple for now. He'll probably end up digging around in there again unless someone stops him.
"Pfeh," Is his only response to the assessment. It'd be rude to argue, but he can't agree either. So he'll just make non-committal noises. Finally he rejoins them, plopping down on the floor to stretch out his legs. He's dirty, doesn't want to get dirt all over Nathan's clean furniture.
no subject
He looks at Tony as he sits on the floor. Weird place for anyone to sit; he actually gives a puzzled stare. Although, being in Nathan's house, it's already been quite a bit of a strange day for him.
"So, how did you two meet?"
Kind of an awkward question, but he thinks it better than just the awkward silence.
no subject
On the furniture or on the floor makes no real difference to Nathan. It's hardly as though he does not do a regular, thorough cleaning of his house. He may be less neurotic than Lazarus about that, but only marginally. No mess lasts very long here.
Click, click. Yet more bricks added while Nathan figures out just how to answer that question. Because yes, it is a bit awkward. Both the circumstances behind the meeting and especially the meeting itself. That it had turned out at all well in the end is almost miraculous.
"Through a mutual connection on the network," he says finally. An awkward answer for an awkward question. It kind of sounds too clinical, but this is probably the least strange way to say it.
It's better than saying that Lazarus arranged it because he had desperately wanted the two of them to be friends so he knew everyone would be okay if he died? Perhaps?
no subject
Keeping himself full has become a bit of a habit for Tony, a preventative measure for the good of everyone around him. He's teetering on a fairly constant precipice between normal behavior, and downright feral. It's really just a bandage over a larger problem, but it's the best he can do on the fly.
"Hnph," Is Tony's response to Nathan's answer. "Something like that." It really was probably the most awkward situation in the history of awkward. Honestly it's amazing they did end up friends despite it all. Lazarus trying too hard, Tony and his volatile temper and insecurities, Nathan and his own insecurities... It was a bad day.
He's just going to ignore any strange looks and continue lounging on the floor like this is perfectly normal. Crunch crunch, apples are tasty. Honestly Tony doesn't mind silence, but it's probably awkward for others yeah.
no subject
"I see," he says, trying to think of something else to get a conversation going. He watches as Nathan clicks more bricks into place, almost mesmerized. It almost impresses him that two such different people could become such good friends. Opposites really do attract.
"So, anything... interesting, lately?" Aside from the incident in the field, that is.
no subject
He stops momentarily, regards the castle. That's the blue section done. Now onto the yellow.
"Echoes aside, my life is not terribly exciting."
Yes, he's . . . not very good at this whole casual conversation thing.
no subject
Rebellious and all that jazz.
"Not a whole lot going on right now. Probably a bad sign, all things considered." Other than the weird echo thing that seems to be going around. The Network is lively enough with it, and it's suspicious but nothing they can really address themselves. Being Numbered is stupid: the novel. "What about you? Business doing alright?"
no subject
"It's doing well enough for the district I'm in. It's not quite as popular as I would like, but I've had a few customers that I hope are putting my name out there." People like Lazarus, or his girlfriend, and maybe even Nux, indirectly. But, those are minor details and it would be rude to disclose customer and potential customer names. And money's not particularly a problem. He just wants to help people be happy with his flower shop.