The memories on their own are bad enough. But when they are mere recollections, they are easier to handle. This? This had been living it, and for someone who would wilt at a slap, witnessing so many people die is perhaps too awful for words. How many more like this is he going to suffer?

"If he thought it was, I don't think he would have had a problem saying it."

Meaning he had reason to believe otherwise. But what reason? That part is missing. He sighs, shakes his head. "I am unsure as to where these kidnappers fit into anything."

It just isn't tracking in his mind. The SPK had been created with the purpose of tracking a mass murderer; what did kidnappings have to do with that? Why would kidnappers have a spy in an organization that should not have been after them in the first place? If it were Kira . . . what use did they have for kidnapping? Nothing quite makes sense.